I SEE YOU IN SNOWFLAKES

August 2016

I could feel the difference in vibrations whenever it was you trying to contact me.
And I know that they weren’t actually different,
but i swear the pressure in air would change whenever i knew you were thinking of me.

I liked you very much.
I liked the way you watched my eyes when I would talk.
I liked the way you’d smile when I got passionate and would trip over my tongue,
it was never the words I was saying that impressed you that much.

I think it was the way we felt so comfortable falling in love.

The signs - never seemed to appear but on some days I noticed how long they had actually been there.
Like your lips - leaving remnants of your skin on all of my rims, 
I get defensive each time I see someone else try to bring a cup to their lips.
Now I know that its weird,
but I promise I’m going somewhere with this.

I keep catching myself with you in my thoughts.
Like in the mornings whenever it is that I wake up,
like every time i’d write whatever it was that was keeping me up.
And even on bad days -
i’d draw the shadows of your face between my words on the page 

because you always looked so peaceful when you’d sleep.

Now I spend hours counting memories of you in my sheets.
500 threads remind me of every word that I know that I said,
sometimes I just wish I had the chance to say them again.

I taste you whenever I sip from my coffee.
And this might just be from habit but, 
it still seems when I go to pour myself a drink.
I leave enough for you on the counter next to the sink.
See I’ll sit there and wait 
Watch the steam dance till it dissipates

And I guess that’s why I tend to leave late most days.
I’ll still spend extra time on the train,
go through pens sketching lines always getting lost on the page.

And I’ll still see you,
when the fog starts to fade.
from whenever breathe in the winter got to close to my face.

But now I’m dancing alone,
in another New England snow globe.
Leaving memories alive for just a little bit more. 

It’s on these nights,
where I remember where we were.
Through every moment reminiscing 
how very rare I knew we were.

We never knew love 
before it came into us.
Now looking back becomes one of my favorite parts,
knowing moments aren’t forever but they’ll stay within us.

At least I had the chance 
to kiss your palm while I had your hand.
Hold it close,
regardless of what direction we each go. 
I promise, no kind of scrape touch or throw could ever threaten my hold.
Know I’ll never let go

Put to the music of:

Kids Will Be Skeletons By: Mogwai